It was at the stroke of midnight Cinderella turned back into a lowly servant girl after having the night of her life dancing with the prince. Moments before she would return to her ’normal’ life she ran down the steps leaving behind the only sign that she had really been at the ball dancing the night away. After she jumped into the carriage, it sped towards home before finally been reduced to nothing but a dented pumpkin. And there she was, just a simple girl wishing she could have the moment back again.
Doesn’t it feel that way most days?
Like you were not really invited to the party, but you went hoping no one would find out that you are not really who you say you are. And, although you are desperately trying to be seen as this competent self assured woman, you are constantly hoping that no one finds out that you spend most days in sweat pants with a cold coffee in your hand.
We dream of the day when we finally become who we've always wanted to be. The moment where everything is ideal and perfect, but quite frankly that’s not real reality. Life is not like that. So yes, you may want a do-over. But what do you want to do over?
- Do you want to be seen as more intentional?
- Do you want to be in more control of your life?
- Do you want to stop the cycle of trying and failing?
- Do you want to value your relationships more?
Having a second chance seems like a long shot to most people because they don’t realize they have a second chance every day. Ok, so it wouldn’t really be called that, but you get the point. It’s not about making a decision once and then hoping for the best. It’s a decision you make every day to do the right thing. The right thing being what pulls you closer to the person you want to be. The woman you’ve always wanted to be.
Let’s be real here. I’ve fought the good fight for most of my life. Fighting the nagging obsession to be perfect, and to have a life that looks like everything is amazing. It’s mostly how I’m wired, and when I realized that the shiny happy life really doesn’t exist I felt a huge sense of relief. I could be myself and stop worrying so much about measuring to every other woman.
With everyone talking about the changes they are going to make this new year, you may be fighting this overwhelming feeling. And if you are honest with yourself you want to throw up your hands and say how is change possible. How can you possibly get everything you want out of your career, your life and your relationships.
It all starts with understanding what you value most, and why you started to begin with. Even Cinderella knew that one night at the ball was not going to change her life. She had seen the prince in the forest before she ever met her fairy god-mother, and it was in then when he had truly seen her worth. It didn’t matter what she looked like on the outside because it was all about the who she was on the inside.
I know we don’t live in a fairy tale world. But then why are we acting like we do? You can have all the do-overs you want but that won’t make you feel any better. Not until you alight your core values with how you live your life every day will you see a significant change in who you are.
So forget the glass slipper, trying to fit the mold and being something you were never meant to be to begin with. Be yourself. Stop looking for a do-over and live YOUR life.