The room was eerily quiet, the only sounds I had heard for hours were the soft footsteps in the hallway, and the kettle boiling water for tea. Other than that, it was silent, and had been that way for the past 24 hours. There I sat, crumpled on the sofa staring at the white board with a mess of arrows, and boxes and writing all staring back at me. The silence had forced me into digging much deeper than I ever had before, but what I found didn’t make sense. There was absolutely no way that God was calling me to do this; none of it seemed possible.
At that point in my life, I was gainfully employed, and although I wasn’t entirely happy where I was; I had no definite plans to make a change of any sort. But when I had agreed to accompany a friend on a silent retreat I was not sure what I was in for. But at the end of the first day, my mind was reeling with vision and calling, my purpose had literally exploded onto the pages of my journal; I was confronted for the first time with something that seemed completely beyond my capabilities.
What if your calling doesn’t make sense?
When words seem to fail you, when you try to explain it to your friends and family, you will almost immediately want to give up. Thoughts of, 'how could this be possible for my life', and, 'I can’t even explain it to someone', else will run rampant through you streams of consciousness. And if you are not careful, you will throw in the towel before you even get started.
Your calling won’t make sense.
The reason it won’t make sense is because you have to follow it, to take steps of obedience every day in order to understand what comes next. The plan is rarely laid out before you in perfect succession. And yet for some reason we think it should be. But let’s be real here… if you knew what it would take to fulfill the calling on your life, you would turn and run in the other direction.
There are so many reasons why we give up before we have even begun.
- The possibility of failure.
- The demand on our time and resources.
- The uncertainty of income.
- The unanswered questions of the future.
- The pain and loss of relationships that don’t get it.
And, yet you are likely at the crossroads of stepping directly into your calling (and that is why you are reading this). Maybe you feel uncertain, and fearful that everything around you will change. Not sure that you are strong enough to take that step of faith into your destiny. The leap towards your purpose. But deep inside of you there is a yearning that will not go away, and you know that if you don’t make a move it will stay with you wherever you go.
Your calling may not make sense, but God does.
- His plan for your life is full of hope.
- He will walk you through every step and across every valley.
- He will provide for the vision He has given you.
- He will lead you to the answers right when you need them.
- He will sustain you and give the companions you need for the journey.
Almost three months after I had spent the weekend in silent retreat, I was faced with a decision to make a significant change in my career. The path seemed uncertain, but I had been given more vision than I knew what to do with. I was completely out of my depth and not sure how it was going to happen, but God had called me and I was willing to take the risk and go.
What is He calling you to do?