Why are you doing life alone? That may seem like an odd question to ask when clearly your life may be full of people, and your pace of life is quick and meaningful. But let me ask you a question, do the people in your life whom you love really know what is going on in your heart? And, do you know what they are facing in this moment?
Life is meant to be done together. Admittedly, I can often isolate myself, and pull the introvert card, which by the way tends to serve me well at times. However, it’s in the moments of deep frustration and longing when I start to realize that the vulnerability of relationship is what moves me to action, is what heals my hurting heart, and is the catalyst to my own breakthrough.
I’ve been blessed in my life to have known and be in relationship with some pretty incredible women. Women who are passionate about life, love to laugh, lean into friendship, and are who are generous with encouragement. It’s not often I don’t leave a conversation with one of my besties that I don’t feel like I can conquer the world. You may wonder, am I blessed or just plain lucky?
Well, I believe wholeheartedly that the favour of God does rest on my relationships, therefore I attribute it to blessing. But, there is something that must be said…I am intentional about leaning into vulnerability in my relationships. Being honest is great, but there is something to be said about when we are able to share the pain of life with one another that our shame is shattered.
So my friend, let me get into your personal space (as if I’m not already). If we were sitting chatting over coffee, how vulnerable would you be? I know you may not know me personally so let me ask you, how vulnerable are you being with your partner, your friends, and those you love? I will let you in on a little secret, they won’t know what to ask if you don’t give them anything to ask about. It’s ok to get personal every once and again.
The big question on your mind may be what happens if you come completely undone. If the pain is so deep that your friends won’t be able to handle it. That’s a fair assessment, but not one that should hold you back from engaging. Get yourself around trustworthy people who are willing to lift you up, to pray with and for you, and to encourage you back to life. And for goodness sake, if you need a therapist - go to one!
It also should go without saying, but I will mention it anyways - be the friend you need! Take a look around at your squad and see where you can lend a helping hand, determine how you can pray for their needs so that your eyes are lifted off of yourself. You will always go further when you are embraced in community, when your squad is strong, and when you know that someone else has your back.
This may feel like more of a pep talk than anything else. You are right. It is my prayer that it is something you need to hear today, because it is something that I needed to hear as well. Together we are better!